Kei-chan's Journal

Hello LiveJournal Peoples. I'm BAAACK!!!!!!!! :)!

Li'l update:

Graduated in May of last year with a BA in English. Got married August 19, 2006. Renewed vows in August of 2007. Working as 1st assistant manager for Casual Male XL. Chris and I have a nice little 2 bd townhouse in Richmond, VA and are struggling, but alright.

On a spiritual journey. Really into Runes right now and stones. Not much else, all though I've done somethings and made some decisions in the last couple of years that NONE of you would ever imagine me doing. But I'm back on track right now (I hope!!!).

Glad to be back. Take care!!!!!!!!!

Wow--I need to update more often. A little bit of news: Erin had her little boy in December and he is C-U-T-E. Also, I am leaving the gym and going to work at David's Bridal as a special occassions consultant. This means Debutantes, Catillions, Prom, Bride's Maids, Flower Girls, etc, etc, etc. Should be VERY exciting. I started last Sunday and am loving it. It's intense though!

I'm all set to graduate in May--woot! FINALLY. Now I just have to survive four very stressful months of school and full-time jobdom.

Tess is due for her first vet visit in Febuary and I'm nervous. She's healthy and all, just needs shots, but the vet we see (while very good with Thaddeus)is really hard on me. She frequently makes comments about people being ready for pets before running out and getting them and quite frankly I'm getting to the point where I'd rather pay $10 more for the visit to go somewhere else. I mean Jessica H. Christ, so I didn't realize the importance of the heartworm test when I first got Thaddeus. I made a COSTLY mistake that scared me half to death. It's was a dumb mistake, but I should not be treated like some animal abuser everytime I come in, right? Arg.

We got the new matress last week and I need a ladder to get into bed. We got a whole Serta set from my folks for X-mas to replace the 20 yr old matress and boxspring we had previously. They were falling apart and we weren't sleeping well in the least. Makes doing other "things" easier and better too ;)!

G'Night!

23 years old at 10:53:58 this evening... it hardly seems like that much time has passed. Seriously, it doesn't. This past weekend, my Hubby and I went to my Nana's in Warsaw (VA, not Poland...) and it was a very nice trip--until the well-intentioned blueberry pie with two candles in it for desert Saturday night. Not that I was ungrateful or that I didn't enjoy it, but it made me seriously think about some things:

At ten, I was finally into the "double-digits;" at thirteen I was a teenager; at fifteen, I was considered an adult (I'm hispanic); at sixteen the previous was re-emphasized for my normal, American heritage; at seventeen I graduated from high school and started college; at eighteen I could vote; at twenty-one I was officially an adult in the eyes of the law; at twenty-two I was married... What does this mean for twenty-three? Is there or will there be any significance?

My conclusion: well, I thought about it long and hard... I will graduate at twenty-three (dear God I hope so!) and have my first professional, salaried job (knock on wood). So, I suppose this will be a good year. I hope so anyway.

We will be debt free by December 8th of this year, which excites me. I want us to build our credit back up. Being rejected for a home loan really upset me and I realized at that moment that I really really didn't want to be one of those people who is perpetually in debt. It may work for some people, and they seem to excell in such situation, but not me. I need a plan. So I came up with one. I am budgeted through June of 2007, at which point I hope to have a new job and logically I can't budget if I don't know the monthly earnings... Wow... I really think to hard about some things.

Well, that's enough of my ramblings. Happy birthday to me, and to all a good night.

Lurve,
Me

Hey! Well, it's been an eventful couple of months so I'll just start talking about it since no one probably even noticed I was gone ; )!

1) SCHOOL- Well, school is going great. So far, As and Bs are pretty standard. I love working at the gym! It's so easy to get in some reading or flash cards while things are slow, or even when they're so busy I just need to sit down and take a break.

2) WORK- Okay, working at Mikasa (or any retail store I believe)was too much for me. I mean, think about it: You work an eight hour shift either in the morning, so you come home too tired to do anything, or mid-day so both morning and evening are shot, or evening so that you get home at like 9:45 to 10 pm and collapse. Now, I'm home no later than 7:30 pm with plenty of time to cook dinner, etc. The gym is closed between 1 and 3:30, so it's a nice elongated break when I work a "double." Because of what I'm paid, I only make about $100 less a month than I would in retail; the trade off is a less stressful environment, encouragement to get/be healthy, and flexability. I.LOVE.IT!

3) MARRIED LIFE- Well, Chris and I have not yet killed eachother. We are both doing very well and managing our budget as well as building good habits of meals together and evening walks with the dog.

4) PROMOTIONS- Chris was promoted at work. Yay!!!

5) DEATH- Marie died. It's been rough, but I think things are starting to go back to normal. I know it's been rough on Chris to lose his mother, but at least she's no longer suffering; and she was suffering.

6) FRIENDS- Erin and Steve, friends of ours. Are expecting their first child; a boy. A couple of weeks ago, Erin went into pre-mature labor. A week of bed rest and she was back to work (she teaches seventh grade English). This past Friday it happened again. She'll be back at work Monday. If she can just hold out another 3 weeks, the baby should be fine. We're keeping our fingers crossed.

7) CHILDREN- We've already been asked (seriously asked) when we plan to start having children, so let me say this loud and clear to everyone: WHEN THE BIRTH CONTROL FAILS, NOT A DAY BEFORE. Look, seriously, we JUST got married and I'm still in school for another semester. Give us a break folks. We can barely support ourselves.

You see, my theory is this: because most people cohabit these days prior to getting married, they are already in a "married" routine. By the time they tie the knot, they're both working steady, good paying jobs and may believe they are ready to take on the responsibility. Has anyone else noticed a rise in divorce? FOLKS- for everyone ONE couple that really is "Ready" for parenthood, there's TWENTY more couples that THINK they're ready. Learn to live with eachother before adding Baby to the equation.

That said, I would not be upset if I were to become pregnant before finishing school or getting a full-time job. It wouldn't be ideal, but I could deal with it. I just would perfer to avoid it for now, kay?

Well, I think that is it! I'll update more frequently from now on. Sorry.

Kei-chan

Had a nice visit with Dad this week. He's feeling better physically, but he's in and out emotionally. Understandable. It make's things hard, but we're all dealing with it in our ways.

My future-father-in-law is plucking my last nerves again--Chris is to call him tomorrow or else Dad D. can expect a REALLY pissed off email from me. Get this:

I get back today from my folks house to find an email from him asking if we were too busy "or not interested" in helping him get up here to the wedding. How DARE he?! We've been busy as HELL up here. Not to mention the shit going on with my father. It is NOT OUR JOB to make arrangments for him. It's enough to have finally pushed me to the point where I HOPE HE CAN'T MAKE IT! The man can drop dead tomorrow and I'll do a jig on his grave. It would be one thing if we said from the beginning "we'll find the hotel and check on cab fare for everyone," but what we SAID from the beginning was "we have no money and cannot be responsible for anyone coming from out of town for the wedding." Dad D. is the only one who doesn't seem to get it.

Dad is doing MUCH better today... but since most of you don't know why I'm telling you this, I'll go ahead and explain:

Sunday evening my father recognized the warning signs of a heart attack, so he took an asprin, woke up my mother, and they went to the hospital. Half way there my father said he was feeling fine and to take him home--Mom refused to do so, and thank God for that!

After Dad was admitted to MJH he told Mom to go on home and get some sleep. She agreed and said she'd return in the morning. Monday morning, the doctors confirmed he had a mild heart attack and they wanted to do some tests. My father has heart disease. We thought he was healthy, and other than this he is... he's only a year older than his father was when this happened to him. My grandfather lived another 30 years. That afternoon, the doctors realized the problem was VERY serious.

The two main arteries in the heart were 70% clogged; the doctors rushed Dad to UVA for a "simple" bypass. Mom called us kids at that point--they weren't sure he'd live. Bless Genjo for driving me to C'ville in the pouring rain Monday, b/c the Jetta (if you read the last post you'd know this) was totaled and I had no way to get home. After several agonizing hours, the word came back that the operation was a success. It had been a quadruple bypass in the end.

Dad is coming through it alright. He ate for the first time since Sunday today and insisted on solid food. He walked today too and started using the bathroom, all good signs towards a great recovery! Man... it sure was scary though.

In other news, NO WEDDING. Justice of peace. Over and done with. Big ceremony next year. Right now, the only thing I want the family focusing on is Daddy. Please keep him in you thoughts and prayers. I'll keep you all posted.

What can happen in 24 hours? A lot.

1) your mother can call because she and some friends are stranded and need you to go pick them up
2) you can get LOST going to pick up said mother and friends
3) you can get into an accident and total your car beyond repair while turning around to go get said mother and friends
4) you can wait for the tow truck with the police and the woman who's jeep charoke you hit because you thought she was turning but instead she breaked and get your first ticket EVER
5) you can be told by the cop that your court date is two days prior to your wedding
6) you can get picked up by mother and friends after father takes good car to them and waits with the POS van b/c AAA got the STATE the van was in wrong
7) you can make it home and not sleep all night to wake up in the morning and go to work at 7 only to get a phone call saying your father is in the hospital--fortunately he knew the warning signs
8) you can get started to work and suddenly the sky POURS rain on you so that you're soaked by the time you get there
9) you can suddenly have to go go #2 and don't make it to work... I'm not going to explain that one any further. I think you get it...
10) you can put on a happy face for 3 hours and make light of the situation at work while on the inside you want to burst into tears
11) finally, your fiance has to bring you a change of clothes you have to tell your boss you can't work that evening after all and then you have to walk home in the seering heat because the weather has changed dramatically...

you can look at everything around you with a new perspective... things could be a lot worse... telling myself that has been the only way I've gotten through the day. Please keep Dad in your thoughts and prayers. We still need him...

well, there are some good storms sweeping through VA at the current moment, but everything looks stable outside at the moment. Last night we had a regular deluge while I was at work, but the rain was definitely needed--and greatly appreciated. Of course, by Thursday I may be ready for Mr. Sun to come back out.

Tessa and Thaddeus are currently passed out in the bedroom. I'd been scrubbing the bathroom floor earlier, so I think they got tired of waiting for me to play with them! Tess hasn't gotten out recentely (thank goodness) but I think I may get her a kitty harness and leash so she can go walking with Thaddeus.

56 MORE DAYS OF FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

While I was working at the gym today, a woman came in with her younger sister (both were in their 60's or early 70's). She was dropping "M" off for her first work out--Rebecca helped her. As M's sister left, we got the opportunity to talk with her about what exactly she was doing at the gym and what her goals were... M is very obess at 150 lbs OVERweight. She told us "I either join a gym, or I die... That's what the doctor told me." She had the most pleasent personality of anyone I've ever met and rose to EVERY challenge to use the machines, even the one's there was physically no way for her to get on; she cried when her attempts would fail. I've never seen anyone who wanted so badly to live.

So, it makes me wonder... if a woman that overweight with diabetes and on multiple perscriptions can come in and give 110% at a gym why can't anyone and everyone. Since I started working at this women's gym, I've found so many women of inspiration to me. I can't believe I used to be so damn lazy... I work out 5 times a week now. It's all thanks to women like M who've shown me that there really is no excuse not to find the time to be healthy.

Now if I can just kick my eating disorder, I'll be okay. Anyway, keep your fingers crossed for the wonderful ladies at my gym who need all the support in the world... and deserve every ounce of it :)!

I came to a realization this evening as I sat in the Jetta waiting for Chris to get out of work: I'm okay. A simple revelation, but an excellent one none the less. Life is insane, I'm running all over the place planning a wedding, working at a gym, and taking care of home life--but I've never been happier. Let me tell you why:

1) I get to play with the neighbor kids in the afternoon, which is a blast.

2) The adult neighbors I have are soo sweet and I LOVE talking to them.

3) I'M GETTING MARRIED IN 2 MONTHS, if that.

4) I had a freakin' awesome time shopping with Erin and MB today for their dresses, which (btw) look so great on them!

5) And, for the first time in a long time, the 60 lbs I've gained since high school doesn't bother me. I feel happy and beautiful, and it feels great.

So, let me take this opportunity to say to all my friends:

I love you guys and thank you for putting up with me through all my whiny patches... I owe you all. Life, as it is, is good.

I'm slightly less stressed out at the moment: I've been hired! Finally, right? I'll be working at Curves with, get this, my mother's retired boss! Small world. She recognized my voice and asked if I was, by any chance related to Kathy T. at WWRC. It's nice to know I'll be working with someone like Judy; she's a nice woman... gave my mother the job which has lead her to where she is now. But enough of that.

I went to dinner with my former Mikasa co-workers last Sunday where Mi proceeded to inform me that they needed a part-time keyholder this summer since the new girl, Sarah, wasn't there long enough yet to be given the promotion. Well, I went in yesterday after confirming my position at Curves and informed Mi that I wanted to work at Mikasa from now until the beginning of August--after all, I can't work two jobs and finalize wedding plans AND get ready for the fall school term. Bleh. Too much... so, anyway, she proceeds to tell me that things have "changed" since Sunday. She took a higher position at another company and is leaving in another couple of weeks. Kristin is interviewing to take her position and they just went recruiting this week; lots of people applied and now Steve can leave too since they've FINALLY found a replacement for him! NOW she's not sure whether or not they'll need me at all, but "Kristin will call me soon." Talk about a brush off... well, I don't know that for sure--but it seems that way.

Either way, I'm employed so I'm happy. No summer school--just wedding planing, working at the gym, and hanging out with friends in my spare time. Oh yeah, my air conditioning's busted... and it can't be fixed till tuesday. I'm thinking of sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. It's MUCH cooler down there. Or maybe the atic. I haven't checked up there yet. Oh well, I'm going to return to Daria Season 3 now.

Ja

ATTENTION: If you want to read this post, read it from beginning to end. If you won’t finish reading it, then please don’t begin to. I just wanted… needed… to share it:

There’s something that happened in my life that I’ve repressed… mostly because I thought “who am I to be so upset?” After all, I had no real connection to what happened… except for being human. Let me stress here at the beginning before I tell any of you this that my experience does not weight at all on my opinion on the war we are currently involved in b/c it doesn’t. They are two separate entities entirely, so don’t confuse the two… please.

It was a Tuesday morning… I remember because James and I had Spanish together on Tuesdays and Thursdays. It was my freshman year and his second senior year… That was my only class on those days and James and I would take turns treating each other to Chick-File for breakfast—we’d eat downstairs of the Commons Area where we could watch cartoons together. It was a cute brother-sister relationship we had going on. I didn’t really notice anything abnormal during class September 11th. We left class a little early, like any other day, and proceeded to the Commons for our usual breakfast time. That was when the first unusual occurrence happened.

A large gathering of students was crowding the information center television which was tuned to the news. James, having family in military personnel, naturally wished to take a look. I, being the self-centered 17 year old that I was back then (and somewhat still am… only older now), simply commented “oh what a shame… must have been a piloting error.” That crash had happened a little earlier… we’d still been in class. James told me no… it wasn’t an accident. I didn’t believe him. I asked why he was so quick to assume someone or some group had done something. Maybe it was my naivety; maybe it was denial.

James all but dragged me down the stairs, insisting we could get food later. Frustrated, I complied. An even larger gathering of students surrounded the large pull-down screen in the television room. It was tuned to the news. The tower was still smoldering… clouds of gray dust raising, sirens in the back ground… The news kept replaying over and over again the plane crashing into the tower. It was during the replays that I saw the plane go in at an entirely different angle then any of the other times. It took me a mere matter of seconds to realize that what I had just seen was not another replay. The announcer confirmed it; the second tower was hit.

I choked. My heart dropped into my stomach. I still wanted to believe it was nothing but I knew that I had just watch people die. I looked to James… he had tears in his eyes. That terrified me. In that moment, the bond between us was permanently linked. We held each other and cried… Around 1 or so he left to go find Michelle and I went to call my father and Chris.

I took a walk that day… the first one in a long time. As I crossed a group of pre-scholars walking with their teachers I smiled and told the woman how lucky those kids were… they had no idea what was going on that day. The woman smiled kindly at me and nodded. I walked on. It was a beautiful day… the kind of day only good things should happen on. I went to church that day and spoke to the minister… I told him how I felt and he offered me words of honesty and compassion. I went back to the dorm and wrote emails to people I hadn’t spoken to in years… turns out DiDi’s father worked in the section of the Pentagon that was hit. For some reason he was ill that day and had called out. She said she never felt so happy. I worried about Tyesha, in the Navy. She and I grew up together… in my yearbook, she wrote “let’s live near each other after we’re grown and married so our kids can play together like we did.” I’m so relieved to hear from her aunt that she’s alive and well, stationed in California.

That night, I closed my eyes and saw that plane crash into the second tower over and over again. I saw the rubble… heard the screams of panic in my mind… the dust clouds… I watched the news for hours earlier and all the information, jumbled in my head, kept replaying. What if we went to war? What if Chris left? What if they called in retired personnel or reinstated the draft? Ridiculous questions, yes, but very real ones to a very frightened 17 year old girl. I got out of bed… Janelle asked where I was going and I told her I don’t know. I paced the hallway down to Kayt and Debbie’s room. They were watching a movie to take their minds off of the day’s events. I spent the night on their floor. In the morning I discovered Janelle had been quite worried about me, but I assured her I’d be alright. And from that moment on, I was.

My parents didn’t understand why July 4th, 2002, I refused to watch the 9/11 tribute on the television special. I still see those towers… that second one falling… knowing the people died in front of my eyes. I didn’t know them… but somebody did. That was all I needed to feel like this. For years I’ve repressed my feelings about 9/11. Now, let me tell you why:

The news, the media, the lies, the war, and the Hollywood publicity have kept me quiet. I’ve been afraid of talking about what I’ve experienced because it was so miniscule next to those who lost some one or had a family member deployed and killed in Iraq. The new movie coming out regarding the flight that was headed for Washington with its heroic passengers is the worst thing I’ve ever heard of… first of all, it’s too soon—give it another 20 or 30 years… please. I mean God! Look at what they did to Pearl Harbor and the tragedy of the Titanic? What’s WRONG with people in Hollywood? Argh! But that’s another argument.

Tonight… I was watching T.V. I will not tell you what channel or what movie, but it indirectly had to do with 9/11 and, for what ever reason, I FORCED myself to watch it. I forced myself to watch that plane hit the tower over and over again; to see the firemen and EMTs rushing in. I wanted to change that channel. I wanted to keep pretending that I don’t still have nightmares about that day; to pretend I’m too caught up in being angry with Bush and this “war” which, by the way, is NOT because of 9/11 at ALL. I can’t do that anymore. I have to come to terms with what I saw… Because I know now that I’m not stupid or whiny or anything else negative just because I was affected by what happened… I saw it… I watched it live on television… on a big screen… that tower went down, and I will never forget it. The image is forever branded in my mind, but it is okay. I don’t want to forget… I just want to cry and move past it.

So, that is the first in a long line of confession and truths I want to share with you, my friends that read. I don’t expect comments or anything, though I don’t object to them (positive only please) nor do I want to raise debates regarding the Bush administration or the war… I just needed to get that off my chest. Thank you for reading. God bless America.

Well, things are not nearly as bad as my last post would lead most to believe... Let me explain what's going on here: Chris's mom has been very sick in the hospital and so he made an emergency trip to Houston last Tuesday. He came back that following Thursday, which was good, but he's been... not himself. He's having mood swings and Monday morning we had a huge fight over... I don't even remember what. So, that's why I wrote what I wrote; in frustration and desperation to be heard. We talked on the way to C'ville though, so I think everything is cool.

We met with the minister Tuesday morning and all went well. We have some paper work to fill out, no biggie.

Though still unemployed, I have had three potential job offers open up to me today. One is from ARC (American Retarded Citizens) for a family counselor, another is from APEX systems, Inc. at an entry-level business position offering $27,000 plus benefits, and the last is an interpreter for a neighbor of mine (I’m teaching his step-daughter Spanish currently).

Other than that, things have been same old, same old. Just taking each day a day at a time, you know? Ja!

I don't care anymore I really don't. I'll just keep everything bottled up and never say a word because damn it... I'm fucking mad.

Well, after a massive migraine, and a long trip to get Chris from the Richmond Airport, I finally bothered to check my school account to see if my grades had posted. Here are the results:

Chaucer-> B
19th Century Literature-> C
Spanish 202-> C

Go me!

Ja

Somebody once said that death is the ultimate fairness; it does not discriminate. Old and young, rich and poor, all will die in their own time. This is the way of the world. But death is not always fair in the other respects.

Why do some people die happy and others misreable? Why do some people die a slow, painful death and others suddenly in their sleep? Why do some good people die with no one to mourn them and assholes die with legions of "friends" and "family" to lie about how great they were? Why are these truths fair?

A little glimmer of hope. Mom Reed's blood pressure has risen a bit.

Ever notice how you don't appreciate things till they're gone? We've been with out gas in this apartment since Friday. That means I can't cook, we don't have warm water, and we don't have heat--which surprisingly enough is still a big deal here at the beginning of May. We're hoping to have it cut back on by Sunday, but it's been rough. Having to call my folks for money was depressing, but not nearly as much as the option the gas company gave us: numbers for local charities. I've never been so humiliated. I don't suppose I should feel that way, but I do. I don't want to survive on handouts... I want to do it on my own. Which is difficult when you're unemployed.

I must have gone to a dozen places yesterday with resumes (the Nanny thing didn't pan out) which means now I have to play the waiting game. Ugh. I hate the waiting game. I called Mi today too to see if Mikasa had any opennings--she just filled the empty spot last week. I'm hoping at least one of the places I visited yesterday will call me before Friday. Wish me luck!

I think things are kind of compounded with the fact that Chris's mom is still in the hospital. I believe the latest update was that she had a "flesh eating virus" bacteria that forced doctors to remove something like 30 lbs of flesh from her abdomen. This, compiled with her Diabetes and Dialysis, makes her recovery very dificult. Basically, it's up to her now to decide whether or not she wants to fight. It's a nasty situation. The next week is crucial.

Anyway, I've gotta run--finals and all. Just, please keep Mom Reed in your thoughts and prayers, and take care of yourselves. I love you all.

Kei-chan

I don't think it went badly. I met with Dan M. today to interview for the Nanny position he'd posted for in the local employment paper. Though I'm sure my credentials are a little lacking, he seemed over all happy with me--we seemed to be pretty much on the same page so to speak. Dan was not at all what I was expecting (i.e.- a man in a suite and tie carrying a brief case). Instead, he showed up in jeans and a t-shirt. He was very friendly and relaxed. He smiled a lot and was very pleasant to talk to--I felt entirely comfortable around him. He talked about the kids and I really got a sense that he was active in their lives and that family was really important to him. He doesn't want a nanny for the reasons I was expecting. He hasn't been to work in months because of the divorce and "his family needed him, and still needs him." But he also feels like he needs to get back to work, etc. Totally understandable.

There are a few contenders for this position, and if a more experienced nanny who can dedicate 10 or more years comes along I'm sure she'd be better than I to take this job, but I really hope it's me. They sound like a really great family and I'd really like to get to know them. Now comes the agonizing 24 hour wait. He's calling me tomorrow to set up a time next week when I can come to the house and meet the children (all four since the oldest is home from his boarding prep-school for a couple of weeks). They are 3 (Hannah), 7 (James), 12 (Audrey), and 14 (???). Just a side note, I remember all this from the conversation. No notes taken. If they like me, which I hope they will, I MAY get the job. That's a big MAY though. While Dan and I talked and seemed to get along and seemed on par with our ideas for the children and what have you, I may not be what he's looking for as far as a long term commitment. Long term for me is 3 or more years and I think he wants someone 5-10 years or so. His current nanny has been with them 5 years. I don't MIND staying on that long, but when Chris and I start our own family I would most likely have to find something else. Eh, it's up in the air. I also don't think he liked that fact that I'm so artistic.

You see, his soon to be ex-wife was an "artist" though her methods sound more like a beatnick or a hippie. No disapline for the children, no setting goals, no focus on school work or physical fitness... nothing. These are some of the factors as to why he has full custody of all 4 children. The ex is appealing for the 5th time to get more than visitation, but this will be the last time she can appeal and if she looses she'll only visit them 4 times a month. Kind of a nasty situation, but Dan earnestly does seem to have his childrens best interest at heart.

I suppose I'm worrying to much though. The interview took almost an hour and most of the things I think that would disqualify me were brought up near the middle. I doubt he would have bothered finishing the interview with me if he thought at that point that I wasn't worth considering any farther. It would just be a waste of his time and mine.

Anyhoo, I'll keep you all updated! :)

That was a relax bit of my weekend. I studied Spanish for several hours last night and, last week, finished preparing the dialogue for the comic book discussion of "Daisy Miller" by Henry James due next Monday for 19th Century Lit. Today, I've started on my Chaucer paper, done my internet post for 19th Century Lit, and will do some reading and note-taking before the night is over. Certainly, after all that, you can understand why I went with my aunt, grandmother, extended grandma (my aunt's mother in law), and my extended aunt (my aunt's sister in law) for tea at the Jefferson Hotel. It was really nice to see all of them again and to get a chance to relax and sip yummy tea and eat watercrest sandwiches with chocolat dipped strawberries for desert. Droool!!!!!

Other then that, my life has been pretty stale. Mom started helping me make wedding plans last weekend. We went by Chandler's Bakery for cake samples, but in the end Mom decided to have a friend at work make the cake for us--which is totally fine with me. The cheaper the supplies the better! We also looked at suits and dresses for the occassion and discussed the reception: Jeans, t-shirts, and burgers--now that's my kind of reception! It's exciting, yet nerve wracking and tiresome. I'm basically just putting it out of my head until classes end on the 1st. Only two real finals though, so I'm VERY happy about that. Ugh... well, it's getting late, so I'd better go make dinner.

Ja for now!

Kei-chan

Well, weddings are a funny thing. No matter how much you convince yourself that you don't need the fancy dress or the massive grouping of people lavish attention on you... when you walk into that bridal shop and try on that first gown, a little switch clicks on in your head and for the first time... you really see yourself as beautiful. And then you see the price tag and feel sick to your stomach.

After this experience in the golden dress of my fantasies, it dawned on me how much I really did want to feel like a princess. Just for one shining moment to have all the attention in the world focused on me. It was almost painful. In that instant it had hit me: I was getting married. It may sound stupid, but it was like my mind had been repressing the fact for some odd reason. I wonder if all brides go through this...

Anyway, so I get home and Chris and I book our honeymoon reservations. We're staying at an Embassy Suites hotel in Williamsburg for a few days. It'll be nice to do some sight seeing and all during the day. I'm leaving the animals with Mom and Dad. It's getting closer and closer now and I'm really freaking out the more I think about it so I'm going to go to be now.

Ja!
The nervous Bride-to-be